


The Great Dildo Incident

by jelatin



Category: Free!
Genre: Dildos, M/M, Sex Toys
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-10-27
Updated: 2015-10-27
Packaged: 2018-04-28 10:47:31
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 756
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5087740
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jelatin/pseuds/jelatin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sousuke finds a dildo in the dishwasher. It's Momotarou's.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Great Dildo Incident

**Author's Note:**

> Hahahahaha.  
> I can't write.  
> This is unbeta'd and apparently I wrote this in two different tenses murder me. I maybe fixed it.  
> Well.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The initial discovery.

  Sousuke couldn't breathe. He'd been laughing for 10 straight minutes and he feared it was going to be quite detrimental to his health. _What a way to go_ , he mused, in between the choking heaves. _Killed by my own enjoyment. At least I got in some killer humor before I dropped. Ahhh, this seems like a good moment for_ -the (slightly) dying man was jerked out of his doubtfully necessary inner monologue by a rogue book impaling into his head. He ceased all laughter with only a grunt of injured pride as a farewell, and looked up at his assailant. Momotarou was far from his usual joyous self, his face portraying a sense of anguish and betrayal. There are tears, fat and plump, at the edge of his eyelashes, and Sousuke felt a need to lick them off. _No, no, no, bad Sou_ , he scolded himself, reminding himself that carnal desires have no place in the current situation. Which brought him back to this episode.

Momo stood, stance closed and static, as Sousuke held a dildo, bright teal with small grooves along the edge. It's rather large, and the idea that Momotarou could fit this into his ass was by far, the most spectacular part of this escapade. And he had used it, because there would be no other reason for it to have been cleaned using the dishwasher, left for the raven-haired man to find as he innocently put away the dishes. Sousuke straightened up, lifting the dildo to eye level and examining as if it was some kind of rare specimen. "Judging by the way you reacted when you saw this, I assume this is yours?" He speculated, eyeing Momo from around the offending tool.

"Bwa-? Sousuke please!!! I-I am really really sorry but, can you let it go?!!" Momo's voice had climbed higher with each word, resulting in a high whine which made the taller man wince. He sighed, dropping the dildo on a nearby table and moving to place his hands on the shorter's shoulders. The poor boy quivered. He was already highly embarrassed, and now the overwhelming presence of Sousuke was instilling fear within him. While he internally exploded, Sousuke gently led him to the couch. As the otter sat down, he kept his eyes on his lap and waited for a tongue-lashing on the proper etiquette of washing a dildo. Certainly using a dishwasher was beyond those parameters, right? But the guy at the sex shop had told him it was dishwasher safe, and why would he mention it if it hadn't been meant for dishwashers? Maybe he just wanted to embellish the good points of the dildo. _Well_ , he internally sighed, _This looks like the last time I ever take dildo washing advice from a shady guy at the sex shop._

Surprisingly, Sousuke did nothing more than pat Momo's head and tell him to be more mindful of his dildos. His voice cracked on the word dildo, and he snickered behind his hand. Momo initially felt relief, then fired up again at his roommates amused expression. "Geez, Sousuke, it's not like I have a GPS on all of my dildos." He huffed, crossing his arms and pouting. Sousuke waved a placating hand at him as continued to snicker and lumbered out of the kitchen. Momotarou watched him go, and then collapsed back onto the couch. His pulse was hammering a fast rhythm, heart beating in his chest with the force of a million men. _And not just any men, no, these had to be baras, ripped and huge_. He giggled to himself, the thought, and consequential mental image, of a million built men beating upon his heart like a drum was strangely amusing.

As the last of his mirth tapered off, he sighed and held his head in his hands. They were cold, as they usually were, and he used them to cool his burning cheeks. Sousuke knew. There was no way he wouldn't. The dildo was fucking _teal_ for Pete's sake! The exact shade Sousuke had pointed out as a favorite of his. Momotarou groaned, berating his past self for being so careless. He allowed himself five more seconds of embarrassment before he stood up and slapped both his cheeks. "Okay! No more moping, Momo! You've got life to deal with." And by life, he meant the paper he had to write for his biology class. He picked up the dildo carefully and headed into his own room to grab his laptop and finally get some work done.

**Author's Note:**

> I might continue this. I mean, last time I wrote about a dildo and soumomo it ended up a pwp so, yeah.  
> If you read this and find mistakes, let me know, and I'll do something about that shiz.


End file.
